Journey of Re-Discovery – Part III

Aside

Clouds

Journey of Re-Discovery – Part III

A Startling Change of Direction

When I came back from Britain, I was changed in ways that I could not even begin to fathom. Suddenly, my life as a married woman, living at home, wasn’t so fulfilling. I started asking questions of myself… and then I got a channeled message from some Light Beings that basically told me it was time to stop hiding away.

I wasn’t living my life; I was living my husband’s. Yes, he had given the time to begin searching into areas, but he wasn’t going there with me. In my heart, I knew I would have to take the next part of my journey alone.

This feeling only grew through the autumn, winter and spring months. At some point, my husband attended a conference and there met a woman with whom he instantly clicked. This person was married and lived in the Olympia area. Together, my husband and his new friend attempted to grow the acquaintance to include myself and her husband. Yet all I could see was how my husband was relating to another.

I wasn’t jealous for I knew that my husband wasn’t in love with this person, but he was able to talk to her like he had never been able to talk to me… even before we got married. David was very emotionally repressed, something stemming from his own upbringing and childhood. There was no true intimacy between us… just a kind of friendship stemming from our mutual interest in the mountains. When that began to change, suddenly there wasn’t much to keep us together.

By sometime the following spring, I decided that I had had enough. I would go to business college and get a job. So I enrolled in a program located in downtown Seattle and took the bus to get there. That summer, I found myself saying good-bye to the trees and mountains with which I had spent so much time hiking and backpacking.

By the following autumn, I had moved to Spokane, at first intending to work with the two channelers with whom I had come to know as at least friends. However, when I actually got to Spokane and saw how these two individuals interacted as a married couple, I determined that I would attempt to get my own job and place to live.

I found a little basement apartment in an old house on the South Hill. That November, I received the final divorce papers from my husband and fell immediately into a profound depression. I hadn’t realized just how much I loved him, but it was too late now. I was free. Sometimes freedom comes with a heavy price.

I found a job… and eventually also found some friends. Continuing on with my metaphysical journey started in Seattle, I connected with another small group who were exploring a kind of meditation. We would sit in a circle with one facilitator and then tell our impressions of what we were seeing. I found that I could see quite a bit…

Yet the important thing about this group was that I first encountered the books of the I AM movement there. The facilitator had a couple of the books in a bookcase in her living room. I asked if I could take them home and she said yes. I ended up devouring them… filling my head up with tales of St. Germain, Mt. Shasta, the Great White Brotherhood, degrees and the like.

While in Spokane, I joined another couple of hiking groups and took up horseback riding. By the second summer, I was riding every week and getting quite good for having started so late in life (mid-30’s).

I don’t remember the particulars, but soon afterward, by the following spring I had contacted members of the Church Universal and Triumphant. I eagerly gulped up the teaching about the Ascended Masters, angels and Archangels. I listened to the dictations given by the Messenger, Elizabeth Clare Prophet. And I attended some of the sessions, Wednesday night healing sessions, Friday night Ascension session and Sunday services, all held in the living room of a small house.

I was being pushed from within to quickly expand. Very late, I decided to attend the Fourth of July Gathering held at the Summit Lighthouse campus near Malibu, California. I flew to Los Angeles on faith, having no place to stay or knowing anything about L.A. or its environs. While waiting for a bus to get me to the campus, I met a lady who was also attending the conference. She volunteered to get me a place to at least sleep for the long weekend. Everything fell into place as things do when you are meant to be somewhere…

Yes, I slept on the floor along with several other people, but there was a roof over my head and transportation to and fro the conference.

I was a beginner and not yet a Keeper of the Flame, which is what the Church Universal and Triumphant calls (or called) its members. So I was relegated to the beginners’ tent to learn simple degrees, receive teachings until we could attend the evening sessions where the Messenger would give a lecture and then deliver a dictation from one of the Ascended hosts.

My first dictation was from Archangel Raphael. According to some of my instructor / hosts, that was supposed to mean something… What exactly I still cannot say…

In the following days, I was baptized and then had a strange “memory” come to me… about being the Twin Flame of Stephen the Martyr. I felt an intense love of Jesus and many of the other Masters who were entering into my conscious awareness for the first time in this lifetime, St. Germain, Serapis Bey, Kuthumi, and others. And the magnificent Archangels and their Archeia (female counterparts)… for me Archangel Michael stood out by far. I didn’t understand the “why”, I just KNEW Him and put a card with His picture in my new degree book.

This conference was a total blur of new sensations, knowledge and knowingness erupting to the surface of my confused ego mind. Before I went home, I found out that the next session of Summit University would be held in Montana, at the Royal Teton Ranch, located to the south of Livingston, Montana and just north of Yellowstone National Park. By mid-September, I found myself having quit my job, sold most of my belongings and moving to the Ranch. I would spent the next two years there and a total of four and half years as a Keeper of the Flame. It was life-changing experience for me. I would never be the same person as I was before.

The Royal Teton Ranch

For someone who has never been to Montana, it is hard to imagine the enormity of the land and the skies. “Big Skies of Montana” could not be more true a saying. The land is vast and large tracts are still relatively empty of people, filled with large ranches, small towns, farms, tall, tall mountains, boisterous rivers and huge lakes. As I drove to Montana on a cloudy September day I had no idea what I was getting into… yet, again. I was one to take chances and to forget about the consequences of not following the pattern of a “normal” life. The spirit within was a very demanding one and I was learning to obey its wishes.

When I arrived at the “Ranch”, I found the lodgings to be a scattering of old mining trailers. I had to share a room with two other women and sleep in a bunk. Needless to say, my expectations crashed to the ground. This wasn’t going to be a picnic in the woods; quite the opposite. It would be a struggle to survive the next two years.

My “job” was in the Construction Office. Since I had some office skills, I could be a clerk. I was never quite sure of what I was doing there, but shared office space with guys coming and going on different jobs. The Ranch was being turned into the eventual headquarters of the Church Universal and Triumphant.

The climate of Montana was another shock. The Ranch was situated on the Yellowstone River, at some 5,000 feet in elevation, deep in the Rockies. While initially dry, it got quite cold there in the winter months. Autumn lasted two weeks, with the golden leaves of the cottonwood and aspen blazing against the rugged rocky slopes of the steep valley and then abruptly dropping to the ground. The first snows hit in October and by November, the temperatures plunged into the -30 degree F range, cold enough to make your nose whiskers freeze as we walked quickly between buildings.

Considered still a “beginner”, I did my degrees with a small group in a room separate from those who were considered “staff” and other Keepers of the Flame who came in for sessions, especially in the evenings and on weekends.

The schedule was grueling. We were expected to get up at 5 a.m., wash, dress and go to degrees for at least an hour and half before breakfast; then breakfast was served in a cafeteria – you ate whatever was being served; then we went to “work”, whatever that consisted of for each person. Around noon, it was lunch time, everyone breaking then to eat and then back to work. By four, it was quitting time, so you could go “home”, clean up and dress for the evening session. Next came dinner and then more degrees… sometimes lasting into the wee hours if there was to be a dictation that night. We worked half day on Saturday and then had the afternoon to do whatever and were expected to be at dinner and later degrees by evening.

Degrees are a kind of mantra, spoken in rhythmic fashion often quite fast… blazing would be a good description of the degrees done by senior staff members. The degrees were based on the Seven Rays of God: Blue (Indigo) for the First Ray, Archangel Michael, El Morya, Chohan; Pink, Second Ray, Archangel Chamuel, Paul the Venetian… and so on. Anyone curious to learn more can go to the Summit Lighthouse website. They still have a publishing house and various study groups sprinkled around the world.

Besides the opportunity to learn about the Ascended Masters, et al, I was being given a first class education on spiritual pride and the misuse of power. By the time I arrived at the Ranch, I had not yet personally encountered the Messenger, Elizabeth Clare Prophet. I would have an opportunity to direct a few of her phone calls to her office that was nearby the reception center, in a little cabin at the entrance of the Ranch grounds. We were expected to cover the receptionist on occasion. One day, I got to take the phones… and the Messenger called. Recognizing the voice on the other end, I was a bit awkward on the phone and fumbled a bit with the connection. For that, I received a scolding and wasn’t allowed to answer the phones ever again. Early on, I found that ECP was not very pleasant in person.

While her followers attributed this irritability to ECP being “on the Blue Ray”, I thought it was something else. She was just rude and arrogant. I started to question to validity of some of the material that she claimed was coming from the Ascended Masters. And when ECP assigned “past” lives of great glory to various members of her own family, I begin to understand the concept of spiritual hubris or pride. There was no humility in the woman, something that exists in plentitude within REAL Masters.

After a few months of the brutal schedule, I came down with some kind of influenza. I ended up lying in my bunk (lower one, so I wouldn’t fall) in a feverish state, barely eating or drinking for ten days. When I finally emerged from my sick bed, I was as weak as a new-born lamb, barely able to walk or talk. Yet, I felt like I had been reborn into a new being. Just what that being consisted of was yet to be discovered.

I had lived at the Ranch for a year before the first Summit University was opened. Students from all around the world attended. There were Germans, Swedes, and Brits, a couple of people from South America and from various parts of the States. And now that I was a student, I was compelled to move to another residence, still another mining trailer, but this time located miles from the Ranch to the north.

We traveled by bus to degrees, breakfast and then class for the next three months. Sometime in the winter or early spring, I knew that my health was waning. I was extremely fatigued and experiencing strange aches all over my body, especially where there was a grouping of lymph nodes. My throat was swollen all of the time and sometimes I ran a low-grade fever. I woke up from disturbed sleep soaking from night sweats and became extremely depressed. Still, as much as I could, I attended classes, degrees and all the rest.

By spring, I was losing weight. From being about 130 pounds, I had dropped to under 120 pounds and could wear a size 6 in clothes. While that weight may be considered stylish by some, I was underweight for my height, and tired all the time.

When my parents visited in the early summer of the second year, I was reluctantly given permission to spend some time with them. Relationships between family members and church members was not encouraged. All outsiders were considered “them” and insiders spoken of being “chosen by God.” Sound familiar? It was a cult, nothing less, nothing more. And there I was, alone, in the wilderness with a bunch of nice people… no wonder most of my relatives had, by this time, written me off as being rather strange, even demented.

I was entirely and completely engaged in being there at the Ranch. In fact, I wanted to stay on as a staff member but at the end of my second summer, I was denied that privilege and ended up being told that I needed to leave The Ranch.

This little personal event occurred at the same time the Yellowstone fires were raging to the south of the Ranch, part of which bordered on the northern boundary of the Park. When I left the Ranch, the fires were still burning; we had been breathing smoke for over two months. Occasionally we watched with fascination as the great fires ran up a ridge sending billows of smoke into the skies, until the world was obscured by smoke and ash. It was a suitable setting for how I felt in those days…

My life seemed to be made up of one shock after another. Here was another startling turn of events, but in the end, one that helped me break free, eventually from the hold that the church and its culture had over me. Still it would take another year or more to break free completely.

As I drove my packed car out of the Ranch grounds, through the open cattle gate and onto the Gallatin Highway, I whispered to myself, “I’m free!”

Never was it so true… I felt a huge release, yet as I wrote above, the Church still had its claws in my flesh and it took a while to extricate myself from this influence.

What next? I drove to my parent’s house in Seattle and then onto my elder sister’s house in British Columbia. I was still a stranger in a strange land. You have to remember that I had lived in a purposefully closed culture for a period of two solid years and was in a fragile physical condition, now weighing only 113 pounds.

The reaction of the elder sister to my presence was eye-opening. After spending an afternoon doing food preparation, baking bread and making dinner for the family, we sat down to eat at the table. In the enjoyment of the moment, someone had forgotten to leave the light on for my sister who was at choir practice or some other event early that evening. And when she came home and opened the door, she looked in on what passed for a complete family unit, her sister (me), her boyfriend and two children, quietly eating dinner. She went berserk.

There’s no other word for it. The lady completely lost it. The crying, yelling and shrieking went on for literally hours. For the first time in my life, I did not recognize this being who was supposed to be a dear elder sister. What topped that, however, was the next day when the two of us went into Victoria for a shopping trip, she completely suspended the berserk act and behaved as if nothing untoward had happened. I was appalled. Whether or not my sister was possessed by entities or just emotionally unbalanced, I was determined to go. And so I did. It was the beginning of letting go of what had been a large extended family when I was growing up. I didn’t have a choice in the matter. It wasn’t safe for me to be around her, so I left the island and drove back to my parents…

A couple of weeks later, I found refuge in a friend’s house in Spokane and spent the autumn, winter and spring there. By the following June, I was again in Montana…

The story continues in Part IV:  What is a Spiritual Journey?

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Re-Discovery – Part II

Aside

glastonbury_tor_02_by_ladyxboleyn-d57nm3q

Journey of Re-Discovery – Part II

A Passage to Britain

Sometimes a trip is just a trip. Sometimes a trip is a visit into many past lifetimes. The latter case was my experience in my one and only, rather momentous trip to Britain in 1984. It would activate triggers within to remind me of “past” lives lived all over the British Isles.

When I accompanied seven other acquaintances on a trip to Great Britain, I didn’t realize that I was about to begin a new phase of my life and my spiritual journey. It was a month-long trip, visiting villages, ancient spiritual sites and countryside, from the south of England, through Wales and into the lower Highlands of Scotland.

After leaving Gatwick Airport, we drove through the towns and countryside to the southwest of London. I had no desire whatsoever to enter London; not sure why, just did.

We drove first to the New Forest, an ironic name as it is over a thousand years old. The forest was set aside by the Norman conquerors as one of their “hunting” grounds, thus setting out of bounds to all peasants and local people the grazing and hunting rights that their ancestors had enjoyed since time immemorial. It was death to be caught hunting or “poaching” in the king’s woods. Many aristocratic or landed families still treat their lands as inviolate private grounds, removed from their ancient uses.

Needless to say, it was a relief to walk under the ancient oaks of the great forest. Even the word “forest” didn’t seem to quite fit, as there were whole villages in the middle of the forest, left there by the king as they pre-dated the Norman invasion. And wild horses or ponies graze in the forest, although we didn’t see any that day.

We did see and climb a bit over the sprawling limbs of a huge oak tree that would have easily encompassed the square footage of a considerable house.

We stayed that first night in the old village of Avesbury, a village that was built right next to and partially within the ancient stone circle. To me, the circle was “dead”. There was no energy coming from the stones. It had been broken in many places due to the superstitions of Christians who believed that ancient pagans had set up the circle.

Our group stayed in the village over the Summer Solstice, communing with the stones, visiting other nearby ancient sites, including one of the White Horses.

We also visited Stonehenge. Again, I couldn’t “read” the stones, as a fence had been erected to “protect” the stones from all the visitors who came to celebrate the Solstice there. It was also a rather desolate site, set out on a grassy plain, with an odd car park and restroom detracting from the ancient feel of the place.

Next, we moved on to Devonshire. We stayed in Clovelly, a little village that was only accessible by foot. Our luggage was brought to our B & B via the back of a donkey. Very quaint. The next day, we walked on the trail that followed the shoreline, arriving at a small village, where our guide, David, introduced us to a friend. We had tea and then returned to the village, all of us somehow being stuffed into a tiny British car.

Devonshire was a combination of very wild places, isolated farms and villages, as well as busy towns. Many of the rural roads at that time were lined by thick hedgerows, a practice common to the area.

We next worked our way north by northeast to Glastonbury, staying in a bed and breakfast at the foot of Dodd Lane.

I had an odd reaction when we drove into Glastonbury, plunging into an almost immediate depression. I couldn’t bring myself to accompany my friends to dinner, but stayed at the B & B, washing my hair and relaxing.

When I walked down the main street of Glastonbury, I did the normal touristy things like looking at shops and continued on to the Abbey grounds.

Glastonbury Abbey was reduced to an empty shell during the Reformation under Henry Tudor VIII. He and his nobles systematically stripped the then Catholic churches and abbeys of all their wealth and put the monks and nuns out in the street. What had been thriving communities were now either deserted or converted into grand homes for the wealthy land owners.

Glastonbury Abbey was left in ruins. The main building is but a shell. There was another building, called the Abbot’s Kitchen, too. Other than that, the grounds are basically trees and lawn. Not much to see… but a lot to “feel” if you are sensitive like me.

When I entered the innocent looking building called the Abbot’s Kitchen, I was overpowered by a rush of grief. I had to literally sit down for a few minutes, feeling like I was being pressed into the floor. I sat there while other tourists wandered through the exhibit. Finally, our tour guide, David, entered the room. I was able to stand up, just, and tried to tearfully explain what was going on…

David became somewhat embarrassed, as I was in tears. No straight upper lip here… I’m an American. He made some excuse and said he had to meet someone…

I toddled out to the High Street and slowly made my way towards Dodd Lane. Then, after lunch, I headed out on what was called the Pilgrim’s Way… I had already “done” the Abbey; next came the Chalice Well.

In those days, the Well wasn’t very special, just a small narrow garden off a busy road. I understand that it’s been fixed up as it still is a draw for tourists and pilgrims. Still, there was a spring. A pool of red oxidized water was emerging from the hillside and trickling down the slope. I took a drink from the water, knowing that springs were held as sacred for untold ages and that it would be okay to drink.

After the short stop at the Well, I reached the foot of the Tor. Atop the steep hill stands what is the remainder of a chapel dedicated to St. Michael. The sight is dramatic, with the tall tower etched against the sometimes blue skies.

In those days, I was a very dedicated hiker. Climbing the Tor was nothing to me, so I climbed up the grassy slope, noticing as I went the subtle tiers in the hillside, indicating that perhaps this hill had been built in ancient times.

The view from the Tor was pretty… displaying the flat marshy lands to the south and then rolling hills to the north and east. The air was dense with moisture, not being too far from the sea. And it was late June, a time for many early summer storms in Britain.

I decided to continue on the Pilgrim’s Way, and walked down the backside of the Tor towards Chalice Hill. The Tor is considered the masculine power center of the area; Chalice Hill is considered the feminine energy center. I may be getting the names incorrect; this trip was 30 years ago.

I sat on a bench in a little swale between the hills and stared off into space, feeling blissful. I could see prana (sparkling light motes) in the air and was completely relaxed. From pain and sorrow, I had progressed to bliss and joy. That night I was able to join my companions at dinner.

The next day, we progressed northward towards the market town of Stratford on Avon. It was touristy, busy and full of vehicular traffic. The B & B where we were staying was a great sprawling inn. I spent as much time outside walking as I could. I visited exhibits on Tudor England, Queen Elizabeth… and walked along the Avon, sitting in the church and so on.

One of my friends was feeling a bit peaky, so I brought her juice and fruit to eat in the room and went out again to walk.

That night we attended a play at the Royal Shakespearean Theatre. It was a treat, until we got to the after the play dinner part. I refused to eat dinner. I’m not a European; I don’t eat meals in the middle of the night. I can be rather provincial at times…

Off we went again, the next day, heading to the Cotswolds, to stay in the old town of Stow-in-the-Wold. The names of towns and villages in Britain are something. It used to be a sheep-growing area. Now, it was another tiny market town, with a sprinkling of tourists marching through. We stayed at an old inn which served up delicious meals based on Elizabethan recipes or receipts as they called them then.

After browsing through the wonderful villages of the Cotswolds, we headed off towards Shrewsbury and Wales. We took a short walk on the old boundary line between Wales and England, an eerie place set in the woods. And stayed in a pleasant B & B near another old ruined Abbey on the River Wye.

The next day, we drove along the River Wye and then headed into the “high” country of Wales towards Snowdonia and Pen-y-pass, where we were going to stay in a Youth Hostel. The sunny day melted into fog coming in from the Irish Sea, shrouding the dark mountains.

I swear the moment I crossed the border into Wales, my voice started changing intonation. I began to sound like a Welsh person… No, I don’t know the language… but the lilting lift to the words sang to something inside.

Pen-y-Pass was not our original destination, but stayed there we did, making the best of the noisy, cramped setting. The next day we headed out on what was supposed to be a pleasant outing to the top of Snowdon. We started on the wrong trail, the one going to the lake, rather than the Miner’s Trail, which takes you to the top of the peak. Our guide attempted to lead us over the rough cross-country to get to the main trail, but by that time, I had had enough.

We met some British soldiers going down the trail, so my guide handed me over to them to see me safely down to the Hostel. As I was chatting with them, in a somewhat exhausted fashion, one of them asked me if I was Welsh. I said no, but they didn’t believe me until they saw me with my other American friends that evening at “dinner”.

I wasn’t feeling very well. Still, there was the journey to be made, so our party set out on our next destination, a B & B overlooking the Menai Straits, the narrow waters between mainland Wales and the Island of Anglesey. We looked at a lot of castles during that time… castles built by Edward I, the Hammer of the Scots… and of the Welsh.

When we reached a semi-finished castle on Anglesey, I couldn’t even get out of the van, but stayed there until everyone returned. Then we headed to the B & B. I was dropped off, put in the bedroom to rest and fell into a drowsy, feverish sleep.   While in the room, I was able to look over the Menai and onto the island beyond.

I don’t remember much about that part of the trip; I was a bit out of it. I did wake up enough to tour a woolen mill in the north of Wales and to walk through a short bit of Chester, the old Roman town at the border of Wales and England.

We headed towards the lovely Lake District for a couple of days rest and rambling. I took part in the boat tour and some of the wanderings, but spent some time alone at the B & B, just resting and recuperating from Wales.

One day we stopped at an isolated stone circle located not too far from the market town of Keswick. The circle was a modest one, set in a pasture. To get to it, we passed some grazing sheep. The views from the circle were beautiful, taking in the head of two valleys stemming to the south. And the stones were alive. I felt it at once, as I sat on one resting in the pale sunshine of Northern England. Immediately, I felt a response in the stone, like it was a large animal arching its back beneath me. I smiled a secret smile… knowing enough now to keep my experience to myself. My guide, poet that he was, was not as open as I was to the ancient secrets of the earth. How I “knew” these things… well, they came from some other “part” of me, not from my present personality.

Next on the agenda was the Highlands of Scotland. We drove to Hadrian’s Wall and walked on a bit of the old structure, peering off into the “wilds” of lowland Scotland, rolling grassy hills. I tried to imagine painted tribesmen attacking the wall and driving off what remained of the once proud Roman legions who were stationed in that isolated region. It wasn’t too difficult.

Next, onto Scotland. We did not linger in the Lowlands, but drove past Stirling Castle, without stopping, and onto the official beginnings of the Highlands. We stayed at a small village on the River Tay, next to the western edge of Loch Tay, a vast lake running east and west across the base of the Highlands.

Again, I was struck by a cacophony of emotions. I refused to sit in a pub and drink the fine Scottish malt served there and went for a walk back to the B & B. I was experiencing an upwelling of emotions that weren’t making any sense and probably being a general pain to my companions.

We drove north, again, spending a night in Oban, a large town situated on the edge of the Irish Sea and the Inner Hebrides. We were going to spend some days on the tiny island of Iona, ancient site of another abbey… and far more ancient site of a Druidic school, although I didn’t know that at the time.

To get to Iona, you take a ferry to Skye and then a cab or bus to the crossing to Iona, via another tiny passenger-only ferry.

The one hotel on Iona was clean and quiet. The island itself was a blessing. I was able to rest and recuperate there while going on walks to every corner of the tiny island. I went to the Abbey and climbed the hills and tiny valleys, walked barefoot on the beaches and ate the great food. The hotel had its own kitchen gardens and fresh lamb, chicken and fish was provided daily for dinners. We had breakfast and dinner at the inn; the rest of the day food was up to us. I found provisions at the tiny local store and walked and walked, enjoying the semi-solitude and refreshing “summer” weather. We caught the island in a quiet period, filled with sunshine and sunny skies. The air was warm enough to even tempt us to swim in the cold waters of the Irish Sea.

Back to Oban for another night and then it was off to Glasgow and the last part of our tour of a portion of Great Britain. Little did I know that the trip would have life-long implications for me and was a turning point in my life.

Next:  Part III – A Startling Change of Direction

All Rights Reserved, Elizabeth Ayres Escher, http://www.bluedragonjournal.com

 

 

A Journey of Re-Discovery

Aside

Hoh Rain Forest

Note to Readers:  The following articles are not a complete re-telling of my life, which would probably bore most people.  Rather I have selected episodes, personal thoughts and the like, from my journey here as a Wayshower and a First Wave volunteer, assisting the planet and her people towards Ascension.  Of course, for most of my lifetime here, I have not been aware that I was / am a Wayshower.  It was only by being willing to follow the breadcrumbs through the Forest of Forgetfulness that I began to piece together another story altogether different than what I thought I was living…

I will be writing and still am in the process of writing these articles this week, as I’m on “vacation”.  I find writing to be an excellent creative outlet at this time for me, as I go through a tremendous amount of change.  It is the same for many who follow these pages.  My story may or not echo in your own heart, but I hope you enjoy reading it.

A Journey of Re-Discovery

Part I – In the Beginning

This is my story, in my words… It is not a linear story, but spirals in and out, climbing high and sweeping low, as spiritual journeys sometimes do.

As the time for “me” as Eliza approaches to depart from this dimension, revelations and insights continue to make themselves known to my consciousness.

Since I am a walk-in, the heritage of my physical family is not my own. I am not even related to them but for the fact that I share a physical vessel formed of their DNA patterns. What an insight! This revelation doesn’t feel like a burden to me. I don’t feel lost in the world all alone, as I’ve never BEEN alone. My real Family has always been watching over me, if quietly and with circumspection.

I begin to understand why I have never quite related to my two sisters, supposedly the closest of my kin. For a time there was some connection when I was quite a bit younger, but as the years went on, I found myself to be very different than the two of them. And now, I have been fully estranged from both sisters for over 10 years.

As many starseeds have experienced, I have been truly a stranger in a strange land. The third dimension has never made sense to me. I couldn’t comprehend the motives of people and why they treated each other as they did. Now I begin to understand that my understanding of the world was different and would always be different than that of the natives, being I come from a higher dimension. However, not to put myself above any other human being, I could also see the great potential in humanity if they could step beyond the need to punish each other and themselves through acts of violence.

All humans have a huge potential for expressing compassion. You see it in how tender-hearted and devoted parents treat their children. You also see this compassion or love in action flowing from those who love animals and look out for their interests.

Yet, humans have a tendency to get caught up by causes and to discover reasons why they should dislike or even hate another person who doesn’t believe as they do. This outlook has been capitalized on and magnified through the creation of false enemies, by all leaders who endeavor to control the masses for their own benefit.

It has been said that power corrupts. For the last 13,000 years or so, this saying has held true except in rare instances when a ruler or leader has truly listened to the people and put their interests above their own. Being that there were those who opposed peace, abundance and sharing for all, the countries or empires that these leaders created often fell to pieces once their creator passed on.

In looking back at the life that I have had here, I have never been entirely comfortable with competition. In fact, I was rather miserable in team sports while in grade school. Later on, I preferred dancing and hiking as physical exercise.

Hiking and exploring the woods became a favorite past-time for me for many years. For several years, I was a member of a large outdoor club based out of Seattle and became a hike leader. I also grew to love identifying wild flowers, shrubs and trees. As I grew accustomed to being in the woods, I found I could spend time there alone without fear; it was a very natural setting for me to explore my inner self. 

A couple of years ago, a spiritual channeler and healer, Shekinah Rose, told me that I had been on the Path all my life. That was probably so, as I was always trying to look for something to give me solace. I could not find it in the company of other children. I found the activities of many children to be quite inane so I turned to books and discovered worlds of imagination.

In the stories, I could use my own imagination to build up a world of wonder and to solve puzzles. The first books that caught my attention in grade school were the Fairy Tales (Red Book, Blue Book, and Green Book) and others. I discovered the science fiction / fantasy books of Andre Norton as a child, and later explored Mars with Ray Bradbury. Then I found the Lord of the Rings Trilogy by J. R. R. Tolkien, a series that I was to read through the years, again and again. I still have dog-eared copies in my bookcase aside the chair in which I am sitting.

There was a deep longing, a vague remembering of a different way of being. I never truly found what it was by reading books, but the enjoyment of reading blossomed into a love of language and words. This love has assisted me in being able to write as I do, in a simple yet eloquent fashion (or so I’ve been told by readers) that cuts through and reaches the emotional core of a person.

When I was five, we moved to Alaska and lived there for two years. I was in bliss. We were living on the edge of civilization. Moose walked through the neighborhood in the early spring before break-up. We could play in the forest on the edge of the housing development. At school, ice rinks were set up during the winter for the children to play on. Our family went on frequent picnics and drives, venturing forth on the incipient Alaskan Highway or towards Homer for a camping trip. I was in heaven, seeing all kinds of wild creatures and being so near the mountains, sea and great rivers of ice, the glaciers. And then we moved to California and suburbia. What a total let down!

It wouldn’t be until I was out of college that I spent much time in the woods. Yet when I moved to Seattle, I began to hike and backpack, first with friends and then with the Club. I met my husband while backpacking. I guess he was impressed with my knowledge and comfort being in the woods. I wasn’t afraid to get dirty and enjoyed camping out.

Yet, there was always an edge to my physical activities. Despite the fact that I was able to go on long hiking trips and climb mountains, my physical stamina never quite matched that of my husband’s or other hiking companions. Sometimes I was compelled to rest in camp while others continued on with the day’s activities by scrambling up a nearby peak or two. I took quite a long time to recover physically as well, from a long trip. I didn’t really know why.

When I was a child, our family used to have quite a few family get-togethers, large suppers, and sometimes even camping together, especially with my aunt’s family. I remember fishing with my uncle and my Father, out of a boat on a northern California lake, Buck’s Lake. We pulled out big Brownie’s and Dolly Vardens, also known as Bull Trout — before laws were created to protect these wonderful native fish) and then had a fish fry for dinner. Fresh trout and fried potatoes… etc. It was a wonder that I wasn’t a fat kid. None of us were. Obesity was little known then. There was one fat kid in my grade school and he had a problem with his thyroid. 

My spiritual journey began young, first through reading stories then when I was out of college, I started studying various religions and spiritual avenues. Drawn initially to read about Judaism, I was surprised to discover the rural roots of the religion. There were no echoes of remembrance there for me.

When I married my husband, he insisted that I not work, which gave me plenty of time to do other things. I learned to garden through taking some horticultural classes, something that has served me well through the years even when I didn’t have access to a place to plant a garden. I learned plant identification and discovered an ability to remember and id plants through visual memory. It wasn’t long before some people were asking me what the name of this or that plant was, although my knowledge was never very scientific. I simply “knew” where and how plants grew together and what plants I might discover in a specific microclimate zone, which the Cascades and Olympics had many.

Sometimes while hiking I would experience a revelation, for instance on how plants grew in different layers.   The forests of the Olympics and Cascades usually started with the ground covers clinging to the soil or draping over the roots of trees, then ferns, perennials and small shrubs; then taller shrubs or shorter trees (like the Vine Maple), towered over by the tall evergreens of the Pacific Northwest.  I strove to garden the same way in my humble yard and met with some success, using combinations of ground covers, perennials, vines, shrubs and trees. I planted wild strawberries under rhododendrons and Dogwoods, as well as hybrids; they all thrived. Yet, my planting days came to an end when my marriage did, at least for a time.

My husband and I were great friends and traveled easily with each other. Yet when other people entered the picture, my husband’s greater stamina had been joining forces with other folks and out-doing my abilities to keep up. When he started volunteering to do trail work, I was kind of left aside. I already had a large garden to take care of and trail work on the weekends didn’t appeal to me. However, the real sticking point in our marriage was that I was in the midst of making discoveries about my spiritual nature, which made my husband very uncomfortable.

I’ve always been curious, never satisfied with following what was considered “normal” for women. I was quite active physically, hiking on the weekends with my husband, while hiking or scrambling on mid-week trips with another group. And then I gardened. Beside all that, I was reading Ruth Montgomery and other spiritually-oriented books. And I discovered Unity Church. When I saw the books that they offered at their book store, I was in sheer bliss. I took meditation classes, a class in Tai Chi, a spiritual healing class. I went to a channeler for a reading or two. I had psychic surgery done on me by a spiritual healer. I undertook some Re-birthing sessions. And I attended seminars at a nearby spiritual community located on Whidbey Island. This was all during the early 1980’s when the terms “Ascension” and “Light Workers” were not in common usage. At that time, I only knew one semi-historical person who had ascended and that was Jesus Christ. I was not cognizant of the many Indian sages who had undergone ascension within their culture. That would come later.

The story continues in Part II – A Passage to Britain

 

© All Rights Reserved. Elizabeth Ayres Escher, http://www.bluedragonjournal.com

Eliza and the Angels: On Accepting Power

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Eliza and the Angels: On Accepting Power

Channeler:  Tazjima Amariah Kumara VaCoupe

Empowerment, personal sovereignty, self-love… all these are current buzz words among those who are in the process of revealing Truth to a people who have starved on lies for centuries.

Yet, what IS Power, truly? Is it giving yourself permission to beat other people down by your sense of self-importance or superiority?

Hardly… yet this is how many people use and abuse power in our world.

Power is given by the authority within each man OR woman OR child to live free. And long has that individual  power been denied, reviled and suppressed by the Powers That Were.

Lies were invented to strip power and personal sovereignty away from those who were deemed by someone in “authority” who deemed “them” as being “different” or “less than human”   In other words, these lies were invented by those who claimed that authority to act in the lieu of the divinity that exists within everybody, whether they be human, animal, plant or rock.  And they did whatever they pleased, using their self-defined “right” as an excuse. 

How could these self-appointed “authorities” get away with this manipulation? Through their knowledge and misuse of Cosmic laws… laws that they carefully kept hidden from the populace… those whom they “ruled” over as their self-defined Divine Right.

That misused power is now being systematically stripped away from the usurpers of the divine right of all living creatures to exist freely and without prejudice in this world.

Why has it taken so long for this transformation to take place?

Well, to understand that is to understand many things… some things that are presently beyond the capability of the human mind to comprehend right now.

There were reasons why this seeming injustice was allowed to continue. And one reason was simply for the experience of living under conditions that do not exist on ascended planets and have not for hundreds of thousands of years.  Another was the turn of Cycles that exist beyond the boundaries of this world and define all endings and beginnings.  A new cycle is opening, which means new opportunities are arising for those who would be free.

Many souls come here to grow and experience, to develop in their soul’s understanding and compassion, at a much quicker pace than is presently possible in their Home worlds or in the Dimensions of Light that exist beyond all need for material existence.

Souls who are on the journey to become creator gods often come into physical existence, as it is only then that one can truly internalize the lessons that are encountered. One cannot do this by listening to a lecture or reading a book, however pleasurable the experience might be… for a few moments.

One learns by walking the path and stumbling upon it from time to time.

To regain one’s power of self-determination is also to accept the responsibility that goes along with the power that is your right. Responsibility is the acknowledgment that having power does not give you the right to have power OVER others, but to work in cooperation WITH them. This is how all true Masters work together, as one unified Being, which in Truth they ARE.

As the people here become self-empowered and regain their sense of personal sovereignty, they will begin to reach out and embrace others, for that is the true nature of humanity, one that has been suppressed by false teachings and beaten down by the misuse of personal and state power.

To become self-empowered, one must first be willing to let go of the need to be a victim, whether of circumstance, of the abuses of others, of whatever calamity you can imagine… You need to let go of the hold that the vicious circle of victim – perpetrator has over your spirit. In other words, you need to let go of all fear.

Many men and women fear what will happen if they step out of their “comfort” zone, even if that zone of comfort is many sizes too small for their spirit. Fear of the unknown has been highly inculcated within the psyche of man for centuries; it is hard to step through that fear, but it can be done.

Many fear what others will think of them once they have passed the point of no return… no returning back to the conditioned state within which you have once experienced what passes for “living” in this confused world. Yet… once they step across that imaginary line, they begin to taste what true freedom is really like.

With freedom comes responsibility… another thing that people are unwilling to take upon themselves, as many times they have consciously or unconsciously ceded their rights and their self-will for that of others, whether in their own family, in places or offices of “authority”, as mentors, professionals… and the rich and powerful… some of whom “think” that they are better than everyone else around them simply because they “own” more material possessions and land and currently wield more power than the “average” man or woman.

There are those people who truly feel that they deserve more than others. Whether or not their belief is based on reality, it is their truth, despite the fact that it infringes on the rights and power of others.  Because they truly believe in their truth, the Universe has supported them in that belief… until now.

This selfishness… and that’s all it is in truth, is based on fear, as well. It is the primal fear of being nothing at all when all is finally stripped away from oneself… the fear of the truly lost.

This fear stems from the denial of divinity within oneself. And the denial of the divinity within others.

When these lost ones see a person whose light shines, it drives them crazy with a madness that emanates from the deeply suppressed fear of their own divinity. They strike out and in past centuries have succeeded in suppressing and even temporarily destroying these lighted ones.

I say “temporarily” as these same lighted ones spring up like dandelions in a well-kept lawn. Poison them, pull them up by the roots and still they pop up like daisies in a spring rain. For these lighted ones are the light bearers of the planet. Some have been sent here; others have volunteered. They are here for a reason and that is to act as Wayshowers.

The Wayshowers are simply to live the life of one who self-empowered and free to be himself or herself, as one who honors the divinity within all living creatures, within the living flesh of the planet, within the stars in the heavens and within themselves.

We have been sent by Spirit to aid with the birth of Humanity as it transforms itself into a Race of great creative and intuitive powers. We have been the midwives, the teachers, the priests and priestesses, the kings and queens, the warriors and the humble artisans who created great works of art and culture for the people. We have lived long among you, as humans, to enable you to reach the point where you could finally graduate to being an adult, not just one in years, but one in wisdom and understanding.

This wisdom and understanding has come to you through the ages that your soul has lived here, suffering at the hands of the powerful and acting, in turn, as perpetrator of abuses to others, all in the name of experience.

Until you walk in the shoes of another, you cannot understand them. Yet, as you gain in wisdom, your heart and then your Higher Mind open… and then come the revelations.

You HAVE lived as another, many, many times. And when you KNOW this, as written in words of fire upon your own heart, you truly understand and begin to have compassion for yourself and for all the other beings with whom you share your World.

This understanding comes at a great price. You begin to understand the true POWER that exists in Love. It is as soft as a feather and as bright as an exploding star. Within Love is all things and all things exist within Love.

Love is Power.

Balanced Power is Love.

Power that allows others to live freely, within self-determined and self-acknowledged boundaries, is love. It is also respect of the divinity that exists within all beings, whether they walk on two legs, four, or fly, swim or wiggle upon the earth. Those who truly love understand this and do not need to be taught this wisdom for it is written upon their hearts and within their flesh.

Love does not coddle or dismiss responsibility. There is a balance to retain. Cycles flow and seasons change and we flow with them or become as stubborn as rocks.

Even rocks break upon the onset of wind, sun and water… the other elements who naturally seek balance that exists within all Nature.

Flow like the water, swim like the dolphins, run like the horse, laugh like a child… and feel the power that wells up from your center. It is love of life. It is life in love with living. It is YOU.

There is so much to enjoy in this world. Allow joy to be IN you and expressed through your gratitude for being here, alive and able to breath the sweet breathe of freedom that is being carried upon the Cosmic winds that are now sweeping across the Earth.

Accept the freedom that these winds bring to thee, dear ones. Move into that long denied power and beauty; be the one who is willing to express freely what you are experiencing within. And step into your new self-created collective existence that is the New Earth.

It awaits the laughter of children and the footprints of the brave who have walked through the Valley of Darkness and emerged, free of fear and with their hearts filled with gratitude and forgiveness.

We are there, already, waiting for you, dear ones, to greet you in the New Dawn.

We are the Angels, and with Lady Tazjima, we greet you one and all.

Namasté.

 

©All Rights Reserved, Elizabeth Ayres Escher, www.bluedragonjournal.com. Permission is NOT given to change the format of this material from that of its original written form.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Journal Entry 8.21.2014

Seven Devils Range from Zumwalt Prairie

Journal Entry 8.21.2014

It’s a pleasant evening, 82 degrees F, mild, warmish, with a light breeze.  Perfect summer weather.  And after what we experienced in July, very welcomed.

I’m starting a book on Chief Joseph: Guardian of the People, by Candy Moulton.  It’s a short book, but ample to re-experience that lifetime.  I remember standing on the slope above the Imnaha River, looking down at the steep-sided canyon lands arrayed in their early summer green and wondering just how it would feel to be fleeing for your lives down those slopes.  Of course, the people took well-established trails and followed the lines of creeks, reaching the waters of the Snake, whose confluence with the Imnaha was just out of sight behind a ridge and down about 5,000 feet below.  It’s a deep canyon and that was only one that the people traveled across during the course of their 1,500 mile fight and flight.

This encounter with self is bringing up yet another bout of grief, sadness and other emotions for clearing.  The story of the Ni-mii-pu, the People, as the Nez Perce called themselves, is a powerful one that has stamped its presence on the landscape for the last 130+ years.  As you drive through the vast landscape you can cross and re-cross the zigzag trail of the people.  And I have. 

Funny thing about zigzag… that is how I describe my journey in this lifetime, too.  I’ve studied many kinds of spirituality, been a “member” of different groups and left most of them behind.  Now I find that little of the New Age material out there appeals to me.  It seems designed for an altogether different person that what I feel like right now. 

Frankly, I’m tired and of late have little patience for those who come seeking answers to questions that took me years to discover.  Perhaps, like Joseph’s, my journey has been harder than many of you will have to face.  I don’t know… except that when I lie half awake at night speaking telepathically to my family, feeling their wonderful loving energy… I know that I am very content and happy to be going Home, again.

I know that this lifetime has been worth the effort, but it has been an effort… breaking trail for others isn’t easy.  Rananda Kumara (the Higher Self of Master Kuthumi) told me the other day that I’ve been a Wayshower, too. 

I’m a humble person and perhaps one who does not always exhibit a great deal of faith in self.  Seems hard to believe, doesn’t it, after some of the things that I’ve written?  Yet it is a pattern that is fairly typical of the highly sensitive, intelligent star seeds who really don’t “fit in” to what passes for “society”, especially in the Western world.

It was a difficult day at work today, for instance.  As my own Ascension day approaches, I find myself able to see through the games and deceits of others, even when they are not aware of doing or being deceitful.  It is SO evident to me.  It takes all my self-control to gather my compassion, to forgive and let go of any judgment that might creep in as I observe these actions around me.  Of course, not everyone is this way; I work with some very sweet, good-natured people, but still really do not relate to a lot of the things that they seem to value in life.  Home is where I belong and where I am going… soon.  Barely two months away.

I’m beginning to connect strongly with the Higher Self of Lady Tazjima.  No, I’m not going to share with you all just Who that is… other than Angelic.  There are too many people “out there” claiming to be married or the Twin Flame of some famous Archangel or Master, for me to add to the list.  Our Higher Selves share many soul aspects, some of whom are embodied here or have come in as walk-ins.  I’m hardly the only walk-in around; there are many, most especially in this critical time that one Archangel has described as the “Harvest”. 

One slightly impertinent reader on another website questioned who is harvesting whom during this Harvest?  Those whose souls have not planned to ascend in this lifetime will be removed, through death and other means to another world or worlds, even different timelines, according to the souls’ desire for experience.  This happens at the turning of every great cycle and is now going on, so there is an active vying for souls… those who go forward towards ascension, those who might remain at 4D for a cycle or two… and so on.  It’s not a race and it isn’t a judgment, against any soul.  Human beings do tend to judge these things in light of the competitive and unbalanced way they have been conditioned to view all things in their world including themselves.

I can say, unequivocally that I am proud to have spent several lifetimes as an indigenous tribal member.  Most the most part, their cultures were based upon living with the cycles of Nature, moving with the seasons, surviving quite well on the abundant game, fish, berries, roots and nuts available in the landscape through which they passed.  They did not live by the clock or appointments, but by the seasons.  It was a simpler life, a life free from restraint and abusive laws and regulations.

It is evident that after 200 to 300 years of abusing the resources of the world, that humanity is going to be required to make a great shift away from being a consumer society to one that lives with and nurtures the environment.  It is a matter of allowing the feminine energies of intuition and inner wisdom, peace and love to bring balance to a world that has been overheated by the unbalanced masculine energies.  I am not advocating a return to a matrilineal society, but rather a society wherein each individual is encouraged to discover their own inner balance.

Things are changing.  Despite the blatant manipulation of mass media, news is still getting out about positive changes going on in the world, yet there is much to be done by those whose mission and life journeys stretch out ahead of them… carrying them forth in the new dawn of the golden age.  That golden moment has not quite arrived and may take some time, so do what you can to hasten it by working on your self, clearing and discovering what makes you tick, what makes YOU smile; what gives you joy.

For me… I would just like to visit with friends and family at Home and take a long time to become reacquainted with my mate.  We’ve known each other since childhood, but when a soul aspect is gone, it is evident that the person is “different”, not quite whole.  In re-blending with Lady Tazjima, she will become whole, again. 

Many adventures await me in the coming months.  Some of them I might be able to share with you, my readers, some I may not.  Not all that is given forth at 6D by those who sit on the great Councils can yet be made known to humanity, even the starseeded Ground Crew that works on the surface.  When it is time and you need to know… then…. and only then will some things be shared.  

In some ways, living in 5D may not seem so very different than what it has been in 3D.  Still, the air and water is pure, there are no standing armies at Home, the people are friendly and loving, everyone has fulfilling work… etc. 

I understand that some of you first encountering this blog may hope that I can answer your questions.  Perhaps, given some time, I could answer a few, but the questions are there for the sake of your own growth, effort and sense of discovery.  Listen to your inner voice, your intuition, follow your hunches or the messages that some of you receive from your guides or even your Higher Selves and find out your own answers.  Each of us comes from an entirely unique perspective; yours is your own to discover. 

I have followed my zigzag path, like Joseph and his people, over hills, mountains, up valleys, over passes and around, again.  Now my path is straightening out and I will be rejoining my people in the stars.  Think of me next Spring when you see Venus rising like a bright star just before dawn in the lightening skies.  Or as you gaze upon the Pleiades in the cold winter skies.  I will be there, with my own family, from whom I have been apart for a very long time.

Namaste,

Eliza Ayres (Tazjima Amariah Kumara VaCoupe)

All Rights Reserved, Elizabeth Ayres Escher, http://www.bluedragonjournal.com    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

DL Zeta- Wayshowers Provide Alternate Means of Transport into the New Time

This is a timely message for all of those who read this and similar blogs; now is the time to begin to open to the possibility that YOU are a Wayshower for others. While I no longer post the work of others, for such an exceptional and timely post, I will make exception:

DL Zeta- Wayshowers Provide Alternate Means of Transport into the New Time.

Journal Entry 12.21.2013

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Lake StuartJournal Entry 12.21.2013

Powerful and potent Solstice time, Winter and Summer, depending on what latitudes you live in. For us Northerners, it’s a time to reflect on the past year and what a tumultuous one it has been. My life has been quiet, but around me there is a lot of change going on…and within me there is a lot of change going on, as well. However, the inner change is difficult to write about, except to mention that I seem to spend more time at night in partial meditation, dreams and conversations with guides. I have a difficult time remembering everything and I really don’t think it matters at this point. Hmmm, I just floating down the great river and rising in frequency level at the same time.

Today (the 20th) was a very entertaining weather-wise. We had a mild morning which turned into a fierce little snow storm and then a very sloppy wet melting snow on the ground kind of evening. Snow is coming down heavily in the mountains which make the skiers and other winter recreationists quite happy, although travel might be difficult for a couple of days until the roads are sorted out.

Although benign in appearance, the Blues can really pack in the snow, topping 6 to 7 feet or more every winter. That doesn’t sound a lot to many people, but this is a semi-arid part of Washington / Oregon, with plenty of sage brush blue bunchgrass steppe around. In the Blues, in the damper canyons and gullies, tall Douglas Firs, Subalpine Fir and Spruce grow in abundance, while the ridges are spotted with barren areas of lithosol soils which are dotted with abundant wildflowers in season.

No, none of this rambling has anything do with metaphysics and yet it does. I’m aware of the natural environment around me. I can tell you where specific plants, some rare, grow in the Blues because I’ve seen and photographed them. I would like to be more aware of the presence of elementals when I’m out in the woods, although I do make a point to acknowledge them and always bless the forest when I walk through it.

Winter Solstice is the shortest day of the year. From now on, the days will begin to get longer. I always relish the return of light and this year Solstice has a double meaning, for it truly signifies the Return of the Light. The planet has moved completely in 5D and now, our bodies will begin to reflect that transition, at least those who are members of the 5D Tribe (actively pursuing ascension). Others, our neighbors, friends and family members may be experiencing a lot of confusion, but that’s part of the reason we’re here; to assist them to make the transition when they are ready to do so. It is an individual decision, made at a soul level, and definitely not a race, as the Divine Mother so beautifully pointed out in Sirian Heaven’s (Isabel Henn) latest channel.

2014 should be another interesting year for the planet, the light-workers and those who are waking up. Keep breathing, keep calm and centered, laugh a lot, find things that bring joy into your life, spend time in nature and live the Love that you are in truth.

Hugs and kisses,

Eliza

Photo: Lake Stuart, Alpine Lakes Wilderness (from nwhikers.net)