Eliza: In Between
It’s been two months since I last went to work and “retired”. I’m still in an undefined space in between two stories, the one that went ahead and the one that is yet to be written and experienced. Reading this article (http://lissarankin.com/the-space-between-stories) prompted me to write this post, as many people may be experiencing the same or near same state of being… or about to do so.
In moving to the East Coast and still being without a “home” I’m also physically in a kind of no-man’s land, although I seem to land in luxurious surroundings thanks to the generosity of new-found friends and acquaintances. Still, there is a sense of currently being somewhat rootless. I see it as an opportunity to explore what the word “home” means to me, besides the New Age adage that “home is where the heart is”.
In the process of moving, I let go of a massive amount of possessions, including furniture, clothes and vehicle. I also ended up, in effect, losing or letting go of my beloved felines. One cat ran away while I was in the midst of my cross-country trip and the other is being pet-sat (sitted?) in a town located in another state, a four and half hour drive away.
While I can’t pretend to be traumatized by all of the changes that have occurred during a relatively short period, I haven’t felt connected within either. Whenever I go within, my team acknowledges their presence with a quick “We’re here!” and shares little else. I have been, more or less, left to my own devices.
I am truly in a state of betwixt and between, although while fully awake. It is a different experience to be sure. It feels like I am practicing being in the “Now”, letting go of all expectations of the future and memories of the past.
I have found it to be rather easy to release emotions or memories that emerge, handing them over to the Violet Ray for transmutation or working with other rays for various aspects of healing and release. This way of being in the moment, clearing as needed, re-membering as images and visions come to the surface and releasing any associated feelings or emotions, as well, is being second nature.
Yesterday, I painted two small oils of flowers, from photos taken during my trip last year to Costa Rica. It is interesting, having connected to the tropical energy and vibes in Costa Rica that I now find myself living at least part-time in relatively sub-tropical settings. Last week was spent in NE Florida, along the Atlantic coast. I can say that I have walked upon the sands of the ancient seas that covered over the remnants of the legendary island nation of Atlantis. Memories of that far-distant land continue to emerge, gradually, into my awareness if I but “look” into the Akash.
Apparently this is a time to rest and gestate, to allow what is to unfold next in my life to gradually come to the surface to be incorporated into a growing awareness of my true multi-dimensionality. I realize that in some respect I have a long way to still “go”, yet have decided to let go of comparing myself to the journey of others. Each of us is so entirely unique in the gifts that are held within. It’s time to be completely honest with self and to walk with integrity into an undefined “future”.
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Photo Credits: 1) oil painting by Eliza; 2) Fairchild Oak, near Flagler Beach, Florida.