Journal Entry 11.13.2013
Guten nacht, Buenos Dias, good morning… depending on where you are in your day / night, I hope you’re doing well, as well as can be managed during these intense times.
Have you been feeling extra cranky or angry or sad these days? I’ve had intense moments of all these and yet am very detached from the emotions. They don’t really seem to belong to me. Or I’m not holding onto them anymore. Just feeling them, acknowledging them, observing them with some curiosity and then usually forgetting about them immediately. There isn’t any need to hold onto anything these days, especially our emotions. This holds especially true for any hurt or disappointments that we have felt during this lifetime or others. And it holds true, as well, for the really high moments.
Did you know that we live on the most emotional planet in the Universe? Makes us a bunch of bipolar experiential creators to get to play in such an atmosphere! Is it any wonder that the super sensitive among us are in overwhelm much of the time. Oh, to feeeeel that emotion; there’s no escaping it, yet you do not have to claim everything that swims through the air as yours.
Curiously enough I’m not connecting with the grief that people feel when their relative(s) are ill or die. I’ve come to understand that death is a passage and not the end of consciousness; this realization that we all come to eventually can ease the pain when a loved one is suddenly no longer there. And you can feel the same degree of pain and sometimes more when a beloved pet or animal companion dies.
Having the ability to tune into other lifetimes and to have an awareness that you’re not limited to just one solitary lifetime helps to ease other feelings, perhaps of guilt, resentment, shame or whatever, for not accomplishing everything that you thought you ought to in this lifetime. There is more than enough time to experience, and most of us are here to simply be, anyway. Doing and being are two different things. It takes an understanding, letting go of the expectations of others and willingly entering into what makes you tick and kindles a sense of excitement and involvement… and letting go of needing to finish anything. I’m not sure if I’m very clear with what I’m attempting to express here, but feel into these words.
Through my many years of hiking, I discovered that the best part of a trip is the journey, moving through an environment, feeling the effort, drinking in the sights, smelling the air, feeling the breezes or the heat off the rocks, touching the plants, trees and rocks, taking photos and sharing the experience with others or enjoying in on your own. Actually getting to a destination is sometimes a bit of a let-down unless it happens to be a stunning lake or the top of a mountain with a great view. Many times, conditions prevent the completion of a trip, so you go as far as you can go and then return. And in the return trip, you can see the trail and environment from an entirely different perspective.
So it is with our world during this transitional period. We are being given lots of opportunities to see and experience things in a totally different manner than we have before. The ability to allow the experiential quality of the flow just happen without placing expectations on an outcome will assist us in being able to adapt to the different emotions and experiences that do emerge into our awareness.
Remember the fifth dimensional worlds are unbound by limitations. Place none on yourself, your thoughts or emotions. Experience your world like a child. Laugh, cry and smile when you feel the emotions up well in you and then let them go. Enjoy the process and try not to hang onto the experience beyond the moment. Be in the present and present in the experience. Be the walker, the walk and the trail beneath your feet. Be the trees and flowers and the grasses waving in the breeze. You are all these things and you are the creator of the environment that you walk through, so have fun playing in your creation.
A day or so ago, I wrote a piece that was reflective of the Native American (United States) traumatic experiences in the latter part of the 19th century. I have encountered lingering pockets of trauma and grief in the surrounding lands where I live. The echo is not particularly strong, but detectable to a sensitive person like me, especially when in a semi-meditative state. My being here, conscious of the history, is allowing the energy to dissipate. I am able to acknowledge it, honor it and release it. It has nothing to do with me, personally, and everything to do with the collective creation of grief and trauma worldwide. We are all assisting in the release of these emotions by feeling into them, moving through them and letting them go, rather than denying and attempting to suppress them.
This is powerful work we are doing, whether or not we are particularly conscious of doing it at all. Being conscious of the work is helpful, but not necessary. Mastering the ability to ride and stride through multidimensionality brings with it the opportunity to experience many lifetimes. I have moved through some before now, especially some particularly intense Scottish and Welsh lifetimes. Whether or not they were actual lifetimes of mine, I really have no idea. I just experienced them after encountering a trigger, perhaps a story or a movie or even a poem. I’ve been in both places but not for long, so I was encountering something recorded in the Akasha or in my own genetic memories from my human lineage. The earlier experiences have allowed me to learn how to remain in neutral and to move through whatever is coming up, whether a vision or a memory, which may or may not be mine.
So it was, yesterday, in viewing the terrible images of mass destruction in the Philippines that I managed to remain in a fairly neutral state. It felt kind of strange, but allowed me to feel compassion for the struggling survivors yet remain detached, seeing the disaster from a wider perspective than those actually living through it are capable of seeing at the moment. I saw myself looking carefully at photos of the land that was overwhelmed by the tidal surges; it was pretty low. There was no way to avoid being flooded in that place. There wasn’t any high ground, no place to go to escape the waves. The island was all low-lying flat terrain. And not a place that I would want to live in when situated in a country that is pounded frequently by typhoons and tropical storms, as well as being located on the Pacific Ring of Fire.
For nearly a year, I lived on the Pacific Coast. I didn’t understand the draw that the place had for so many people. All I could see and feel was that the sensation of seeing the waves coming in at eye level on a calm day and knowing that they could easily overtop the sand dune rising up behind me…well, I felt a bit uneasy. There were few ways to escape a tsunami if it came in and not much in the way of high ground, at least for a couple of miles inland. And the roads all followed river valleys, which are subjected to high water floods periodically just from local rainstorms. The town where I lived was 14 feet above sea level. I decided to move inland when the opportunity arose and soon it did.
Each of us has to decide where we want to be and how we want to be in the coming months and years. We need to be willing to open our senses and use the abilities that have long been closed off due to the judgments of ourselves and others, mainly stemming from a desire to either fit in or stay safe by not appearing to be weird. Those limitations no longer exist except in any lingering habits or beliefs, which we can now jettison, as well, when we are ready to let go.
Yes, the transitional period is challenging, but it is great to be able to wake up, stretch and take in the world with whole new eyes and senses, some never used before. Much is to be revealed and understandings and aha moments will come fast and furious. Enjoy the show!
Love and kisses,